We live in a society that is fragmented with individualism. We gather in small tribes of people who echo what we think and believe and war against anyone who raises objection. The world continues to get more tense and divided. In this context, it is paramount for Christians to focus on belonging to one another. This king of belonging goes deeper than “being members of the same congregation.” Belonging to one another recognizes our oneness in Christ no matter what differences we have between us.
When Jesus called people to follow him, he called them into a community of believers who had to figure out how to do life together. He called them from different walks of life within the Jewish world. He then called them to follow him into “enemy territory” to befriend those who were “less than” in their eyes, making them equals. Jesus created a small community of followers who had only one thing in common: Jesus. When he’s about to depart and leave the ministry of transforming the world to them, he gives them this command:
John 15:9-17
9 “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. 10 If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commands and remain in his love. 11 I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. 12 My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. 14 You are my friends if you do what I command. 15 I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. 16 You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit—fruit that will last—and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you. 17 This is my command: Love each other.
We are called to be God’s embodiment of love for the world. Before we can even embody this love for the world, we must first learn to love well those who are bound together with us in Christ. We’ve privatized spirituality because it is easier that way. It is easy to feel spiritual on your own. When you are part of a community you have to deal with how annoying “the other” is. The more diverse the church is the more opportunities you have to be annoyed. You don’t like the youth minister or the preacher’s sermons are too long or two boring. The song service is too slow or not reverent enough. In the church, people divide over politics. They can’t see how a “God fearing Christian” could possibly support this or that party because of x, y, z associations with the party, all the while ignoring the shortcomings and unChristlikeness of their own party. The pandemic has highlighted divides between how people understand and accept science. Or camps over which science is better. We seek right information and knowledge rather than right action and unity with Sisters and Brother in the church. Hard conversations are avoided regarding the differences in experiences in this society because of race. When these conversations come up in churches, accusations are thrown around that they are motivated by politics, or they are trying to make others feel bad for the hard experiences they have had.
Spiritual friendship should call us to “be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.” Friendship calls us to open our ears and our hearts to receive the hardships of one another even when it makes us uncomfortable. As people, we tend to get critical and cranky when things don’t go our way. The Communion Table provides a place of confession for that crankiness. We don’t have a time of confession per se in our service, but we do have a time of Dwelling in the Word where we allow Scripture to interpret our lives and call us into a better way of living.
I really like the idea of the church approaching the Lord’s Table to receive the Bread and Cup from the table. It is an act of “Stepping Toward” God (Father-Son-Spirit) that also is a step towards one another. We cannot all step toward the common table without recognizing that we have to also step toward one another. We all come to the one table, to partake of the one loaf, because there is one body of Christ that we are part of. As Paul says in 1 Cor. 10:17 – “Because there is one loaf, we, who are many, are one body, for we all share the one loaf.”
When we take the one loaf together, we unite in our oneness and are able to celebrate the diversity that God brings to his table. Let us be people who really do show the world who Jesus is.
We see a model of friendship in Jesus Christ. God, the Father, Son, and Spirit, lives in unity of divine relationship. God stepped to where we are for the sake of relationship in Jesus Christ. In Jesus, we are invited to into that divine relationship through Christ. We are all bound together in this relationship. We move toward one another in the same way that God moved toward us in Jesus Christ. This is the heart of Philippians 2:1-11.
When you look at your friendships in the church:
Have you created an echo chamber of people who believe and think just like you and share your same view of things?
When you do befriend someone who has different beliefs and views than you, are you looking to educate or fix them so they might know “truth”?
Who in your life helps you better see other’s viewpoints in a way that you can empathize even without fully understanding?